Life missing my forever baby Julian

This is a blog to voice my feelings and thoughts surrounding the death of my precious baby Julian. My twin pregnancy ended tragically with a catastrophic placental abruption. At 35 weeks my two sweet babies were born, and 36 hours later, one of my twin boys died in my arms. Now I have to figure out how life will continue with our surviving twin son and our 2 year old daughter.

Saturday, October 27, 2012

CAPTURE YOUR GRIEF 2012: Day 22 Place of Care/Birth

I think I will pass on this one. Honestly, when I think of the actual buildings associated with my prenatal care or the birth of my twins  - I get very negative and angry feelings.

I can't help it. Before the birth if the twins, when I would see our hospital where the twins were born I would have very happy and positive thoughts. It was the place our first daughter was born and I had very fond memories. But during my prenatal care with the twins, I had many ultrasounds at that hospital, which I found to be stressful and nerve racking. Then there was the delivery - I am angry about  how things proceeded during my arrival to the hospital, about decisions made regarding my delivery and then there is the delivery itself. I feel like mistakes were made.

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